I am proposing that all romantic beginnings should have this cautionary approach- your views?

You are right to want to get to know someone pretty well before getting into a more serious relationship. Your method of going about this leaves some things to be desired. You want to do too much to fast and too direct. All this kind of information can be gathered over a reasonable length of time getting acquainted. I suggest you find out about his reputation from others who know him. Start to get to know him by at first talking about less crucial matters such as interests, occupations some background information like where he has lived, gone to school, what kinds of jobs etc. You first want to find out if you have anything in common. Then if you do progress to more personal topics such as what kind of goals and aspirations he has in life. Discuss with each other your histories, childhoods, family life, illnesses, high points, low points, past relationships etc. In the course of getting to know him you will become aware of all this information you want and such as how he manages his money and is he saves and invests money or just blows it all as he gets it. When it comes time that you think you want to be more intimate such as kissing and having then it is appropriate to ask for blood tests to be sure neither one of you has an STD or HIV which are diseases with serious consequences. Don't be afraid to get to know a man before you have with him and don't let any of them pressure you into having before you are "really" at that point that you know it is what you want and you feel safe. Be safe and wise.